nosy, continued

I’m just gonna stick with this comment from my buddy today. Cuz it pretty much covers half the questions that were asked. Just read on… you’ll see.

a Tonggu Momma said…

favorite guilty pleasure food?

Chicken Scallopini from Macaroni Grill followed by their Turtle Cheesecake. Oh my.

SAT score (heh – you did it to me)?

1300. I think it was like 620 – math and 680 – verbal but I’m not sure. It did manage to get me into a three year degree program at college :)

if you had not married your husband, who would your celebrity spouse have been? and why?

Dude. Is this right to even consider? I mean, I try to not even look at good looking guys out of respect for my husband. If I don’t want him ogling some hottie on the street, then I should reply in kind, right? And to even think of imagining being married to someone totally hott??

You so naughty, TM 😉

Ummm… I really go for the very masculine types. No pretty boys. Evidently, studies now suggest that due to widespread birth control use, women today find more ‘feminine’ men to be more attractive than ruggedly handsome. I guess I’m not taking enough birth control. Most of today’s celebs don’t really appeal to me.

How was that for skirting around the question?

what’s your FAVORITE thing to do when you have a night to yourself? (if you ever do….)

Peruse blogs. Just for fun. I really do love to read others adoption tales :)

Another thing I enjoy is just vegging out in front of some ridiculous chick flick. (think: Pretty Woman. I know. So very sad.) This really happens extremely rarely, though. I have a very hard time sitting and watching a two hour movie. But two hours spent perusing adoption blogs? No problem.

what is the strangest thing you have ever done?

Er. I’m doing it. Living what many might call a very ‘strange’ lifestyle. Mom to four biological children and five (and counting) adopted kiddos with varying special needs. Most folks can’t wrap their heads around that one. Some days I can’t wrap my head around that one.

But God gently nudges me along on those days :)

how would you navigate serious attachment issues if/ when you adopt a child that does struggle in such a way? for example, would it effect the timing of future adoptions? why or why not?

I have navigated some rough waters, attachment wise. Some attachment issues on my child’s end, and some on my end. We’ve never dealt with RAD or anything really severe, but enough to cause life to be tough going some days! I plan to share more about the attachment issues we’ve struggled with, a bit more specifically, later.

absolutely the worst “adoption comment” you ever received and how you responded to it? (and/or how you wished you had responded to it)

Oooh, this is an easy one. I remember it like it was yesterday… I was so fired up! The comment was that our home was no better than an orphanage. And accused us of ‘collecting’ children. Clearly, this person has never spent any time in a real orphanage. Or our home.

Chris reminded me to take the high road. So, I didn’t reply. Thankfully it was a comment left on a blog post years ago, so I was able to calm down before deciding not to do anything. In fact, instead of replying, I let y’all handle it for me :)

what does the inside of your van look like? (I want pictures!)

Uhhhh… what?!?

what toothpaste do you use? (because, girlfriend, you’ve got a seriously killer bright smile)

Whatever my husband buys. He has sensitive teeth, so we use the kind he likes. Truly, your computer monitor must need to be smacked upside the head, because I could really use some whitener. Or is it brightener?

I suspect you’re trying to butter me up after asking me all these questions, TM. But I appreciate it nonetheless. You can bet I’ll be smiling bigger today.

what did you want to be when you grew up?

A doctor? A veterinarian? A momma? A French teacher?

All of the above.

how did you know that God called you to be a momma of a large family?

I didn’t. And I don’t. I try very hard to just take my walk with God one step at a time.

Also, it was never on those terms that He shared His plan for our family. If He’d have said at the beginning that He wanted me to parent a small herd of children, I’d have run in the opposite direction. Very, very quickly.

how do you teach your children to pray?

We pray at mealtimes as well as bedtime. We don’t have a scripted prayer so everyone has to keep it ‘fresh’ every time. We want our kids to actively think about what they want to say to God instead of memorizing a certain prayer.

We try to be good examples of how to pray: what we’re grateful for, thanking God for who He is, recognizing God at work in our lives and petitioning Him to intervene in the lives of others.

We never insist on our children praying, we wait for them to take the initiative. Most nights, there are lots of little hands up, hoping it’s their turn to say the prayer :)

most embarrassing moment pre-motherhood and post-motherhood?

Pre-motherhood “moment” would probably be lying in an entrance exam test for a private school in the 6th grade. I was asked about what I had done that summer and, too embarrassed to share the name of the camp I attended because I thought it was stupid, I told them I didn’t know.

Now who’s stupid? Huh??

Well… that would be me. Did not get accepted to that school. But I did get accepted at another, much better school.

Post-motherhood “moment” would be when we did the big fundraiser for Shepherd’s adoption, I had sold tickets, posted all about it, and then found out that it was illegal in my state. Considered ‘gambling’ in fact. I was sick about it for days. Thankfully a sweet bloggy friend, who is also a lawyer, shared with me that I could still hold a giveaway, I just had to change the wording to include anyone who wanted to enter without purchasing a ticket.

Thank You, God.

It started out horribly, but ended beautifully :)

I could go all day… let me know if you need more… *grin*

Umm, thanks for stopping there, TM. Thankyouveryymuch.



  1. The Gang's Momma! says:

    Umm, Excuse me. Did you just say, "and counting?" Is there news looming? I didn't miss something did I?

    And I love the answer about pretty boys. I get ya on that one. Me? The standing joke is my "thing" for bald, African-American cop types. As indicated by my favorite tv shows piling up in my dvr.

    Thank you, Tonggu Momma. I am so glad you were braver and more creative in your questions than I would have been.

    Or am…

  2. Lost and Found says:

    and counting? Now THIS has me wondering. Hmmm I love your comment about how you encourage your children to pray. I see prayer as what should be a natural acknowledgement for what we are grateful for. I encourage Em to tell me about one good thing every day that she is "happy" for and toys don't count.

  3. So true about the pretty boys!!! Not too sure if I believe the whole birth control thing – I've been on it for a long time now & I still want a manly man (good thing I have one).

    I think it has to do with where & how you're raised. Girly men are much more common in the city – they'd be teased mercilessly (as gay) if they were out in the country. I grew up in a tiny community in Northern Ontario – I'll take rugged, hairy, sweaty, dirty & muscle-y (but muscles from real work, not from "working out" at some gym) over pretty any day!!!

  4. Mommy2three says:

    I love reading your blog, Stephanie, and I don't even know you…but I feel like I do. Funny, and a little weird. haha We will soon be traveling to China to meet our sweet little girl.

  5. Nicole A. says:

    "five (and counting) adopted kiddos" .. how funny is it that this is the part that I (and apparently others) latched onto!! This is a fun post!

    All the best,
    Nicole A. in OH

  6. AND COUNTING? It seems we all want the low-down.

    So spill, girl.

  7. Goodness and Mercy Mom says:

    I'm enjoying your Q and A. You are one brave and funny woman. (I won't count off for not posting a pic of your van since you shared your age yesterday.) Hope all is well with you and your pearly whites, your very masculine hubby, and your nine (and counting) kiddos.


  8. FUN! Love to read your answers!
    Have a wonderful weekend!

  9. Jewels of My Heart says:

    I love your zest for life!
    I wanted to tell you again how much I love my Wild Olive T-shirt! Thank you so much again!

  10. "five and counting" …
    Needing clarification from Hong Kong!
    Love & Blessings,

  11. Wow everyone (pretty much) already hit on "five (and counting) adopted kiddos" – we're at three, and actually when folks ask me if we're done, I always tell them that we were done back in '01, and look where we are now!

    More q and a is always welcome!

    hugs – aus and co.

  12. 3 Peanuts says:

    Love learning ore about BEAUTIFUL you!!! You truly are a beautiful person Stef!!! You inspire me.

  13. a Tonggu Momma says:

    Well done, Stefanie, well done. And you didn't skirt around the man question… you totally answered it the only way you could. I dodged that question on my blog, too… I said The Stig. And if you don't know who he is, no worries, no one else does either. He's always wearing a racing driver helmet on the BCC show "Top Gear." *grin* And I'll forgive you for not posting a photo of the inside of your van. But only cuz I'm so warm, cuddly and sweet. Heh.

  14. momwithfaithandhope says:

    I have been "lurking" for days, maybe weeks now. I don't even remember if I found NoHands or your personal blog first. I love your candor, your energy, and your love for our Father. I appreciate how much time you spend spreading His love via your blog. Your children are gorgeous, and I wouldn't mind seeing a picture of the minivan, only because with three kiddos mine is a disaster, and I'm praying DH will be open to our fourth, so thought I'd just get prepared on how bad a minivan can look like. And like you, I'm into manly men. . .thanks. . .and only have eyes for my hubby.

    I don't know if I'm allowed to ask questions, but how many loads of laundry do you do a day/week? Do the kids have chores? How many hours do you sleep, and what's the bathtime routine like in your house??? I'm not nosy, I would just love to have a household like yours – full of God's children, so I thought I'd live vicariously through you!

  15. Stefanie,
    I started reading Ni Hao Y'all just about the time that horrible comment appeared on your blog. I still can hardly believe that someone would make such a comment, but I suppose that someone of a different background could miss God's calling. Personally I say, "you go girl! Pave the way for the rest of us that dream of big families!"
    I still don't recall how I found you, but I am still grateful that I did. You absolutely inspire me as you walk out your faith!

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