Today was a day. Long. Hard. Exhausting. Today was one of those days that I feel like the kids are winning. And that makes me the conquered, the battered. Most days aren’t like this, which makes today that much more unusual. It seems that the compounded effects of numerous little ‘uns afoot, a child on serious bedrest, an exhausting morning at the oral surgeon’s trying to keep two toddlers out of the doctor’s ‘business’, and an afternoon with NO naps by anyone… well, it got to me. It started out well, I got up early and got my stuff done before the kids got up. Everyone got going to school and Jude, Sophie, Tori and I headed to the oral surgeon’s office. I noticed as I pulled out of the garage that the power steering wasn’t working quite right. Upon inspection, the front right tire was very low. I was happy to see it wasn’t too low that we couldn’t get down the road to the closest gas station. Arrived at the surgeon’s just a few minutes late and checked in. Kids played for a while in the office until they started fighting over the duplos and Jude started standing on things that looked unsafe for an unsteady 2 year old. I tried to act like I had it all under control because I wanted to keep on reading the office copy of People magazine. And then he pooped. We went out to the car and Sophie set off the alarm on the car while I was changing Jude in the back of the car. Slightly unnerving. We were polishing off Jude’s noodles (we have to travel with noodles for Jude or he would never eat) when the tech came out to tell us Tori was in recovery. I’m not even going to go into what was going on in that recovery room, just going to leave it at nauseating, stressful and overwhelming to see her so out of it. Didn’t help that Jude kept slamming the top of the metal trashcan down and unlocking the wheels on the rolling bed on which Tori was unsuspectingly reclined. Gotta say I was reaaaally happy to get out of there. Picked up Isabelle and on the way home Jude fell asleep. And there was no waking him up. BUMMER! The cat nap meant he wouldn’t nap the rest of the day, which left me with one ticked off, tearful and crabby 2 year old. Once we returned home with a milkshake and some serious pain meds in hand, I got Tori set up and let the kids play outside. It wasn’t 5 minutes later that they wanted in, pockets full of sand, courtesy of the dreaded, overused sandbox (why can’t they just play on the swings?!?) The rest of the day was a blur of “I wants” and “Mamaaaa” and “I gotta poop” and “PopPop” and “Max! Boots! Show!” (Jude’s theme song when he’s tired/crabby). It doesn’t help that the doc told us yesterday that he’s getting another ear infection. Tubes might be next, but that’s a story for another overwhelming day.
I know that separately all of my kids are smaller than me. Weaker. Easily outmaneuvered, outwitted. But together, well, they’re good and getting better. I liken them to red ants. When they join forces in large numbers, even as tiny as they are, they overwhelm their prey, and endlessly, mindlessly, eat them down to the bone. That’s me. Wo’ out. Sand all over the furniture. Juice spilled on the floor. Toilet paper heaped in the toilet. Jude got way too many PopPops. Isabelle jumped on the furniture way too much. Sophie took out way too many toys without having to put them back. The boys ate candy when they came home from school instead of something healthier. Chores didn’t get done (except by me!) and the house was lookin’ pretty rough come 5:30. And my man doesn’t like to come home to chaos (who does?) By the time he got home I was ready to hand off that baton. They’re yours now, baba. I need to recharge, thankyouverymuch. I need to have a minute or two for just me.
I thank God that every day is a new day. That He can fill in the gap, refill whatever I lack, whatever they deplete. That He will take my burden, my yoke. It’s a big ‘un. 😉
Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”