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a Lenten update

Ewww.

Sorta kinda wish I hadn’t let you guys in on my Lenten plans.

Cuz it’s not going so great.

Not that anyone asked. I just felt like I should keep y’all posted. In case someone needed to feel better about how their Lenten plans have played out.

Now I’m not sayin’ I’ve totally failed, y’all. Because I haven’t. Mmmm’kay? I mean, besides the Target popcorn incident, and the run in with way too much guacamole, I’ve been hanging in there. No sweets. And almost no snacks. It’s just, well, I’m two weeks in and really not looking forward to the next four weeks.

And that reality makes me feel like a chump. Never having experienced a true Lenten season, I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be feeling, but I don’t feel like I’m heading in the right direction.

Or maybe that’s just my sugar addiction talking?

It feels like I’m just going through the motions much of the time. Focusing on what I’m doing instead of what I’m thinking.

And where my heart is.

Anyone have some advice for me? Ideas? Something that has really spoken to your heart during a time you were struggling to seek Him?

Or some secret way to satisfy a sugar craving without actually eating any sugar? And no, nibbling on sweet Vivi hasn’t worked so far.

Sending out an SOS…

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03.03.10 · my faith 20

Comments

  1. Sharon says

    March 3, 2010 at 9:28 PM

    You are not alone….I slipped up too. My hubby and I have given up sweets. My MIL sent over a sweet potato pie that is to DIE for! (She didn't know we'd given up sweets.) Determined that I would NOT succumb to this culinary delight, I cut huge slices and sent them to my neighbor. Some of it fell apart and I had to use a fork to scoop it all up onto the plate. Of course, that fork went STRAIGHT to my mouth to lick off the stray crumbs and yummy, cinnamon tater goodness. I immediately cringed about what I'd done. There have been other incidences….all small unintentional ones but still. I, too, do not usually join in on this Lenten journey but our new pastor has really inspired us to do this. When I want something sweet I have been going and brushing my teeth. It helps. I mean, who wants sweet potato pie and Crest, ya know? And I keep praying & reading my Bible. I've started keeping a Lenten journal and that has really helped me keep my mind focused on Him.
    Four more weeks…it's not a lifetime…but what He gave up for us was. I'm looking forward to reading the responses you receive about this. I need encouragement too!

    Reply
  2. Missie says

    March 3, 2010 at 9:29 PM

    I've never been good at the fasting thing…ever…being from the south, I love food a ridiculous amount…but I think the sacrifice of saying that your focus on the Lord is more important to you than anything, even *gasp* sugar, helps put you back into the healthy perspective and empathy and thankfulness of all he's sacrificed for us.
    As far as just some tangible help, maybe chewing sugar free gum, or eating some frozen grapes (can you eat fruit?) may help take the edge off. Hang in there, when we are weak He is strong – Thank goodness! I'll be praying for you –
    P.S. your family and your story has really blessed me, thank you for being faithful to share. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  3. Michelle@Life with Three says

    March 3, 2010 at 10:39 PM

    Hey, Stefanie:

    I've never been great at fasting either. At least not from food. I have too many issues with food to make it good fast for me. The computer — that's my usual fast.

    Anyway — the reason I'm commenting is because I did give up sugar voluntarily about for a week not too long ago. If you do give up sugar, you need to increase your protein and your fat intake (good fats — butter, olive oil, whole milk, whole yogurt, whole cheese). The fat and protein will help you feel more satiated. It won't take the sugar craving away completely (you'll still miss the sugar!), but it won't make it unbearable. It's the key to giving up sugar. If I hadn't done that, I would have been waging a losing battle. With sugar there are physiological reasons that make it very hard to give it up by sheer willpower alone.

    I also discovered that my habit of reaching for sugar happened whenever I let myself get super hungry. So, a snack isn't a bad idea, just stick with cheese and nuts. That would fill you up with enough protein and fat to keep the cravings manageable. Does that make sense?

    Hope that helps! Good luck!

    Reply
  4. Jodee Leader says

    March 3, 2010 at 10:50 PM

    You poor thing! I struggle every single year! In fact, I would about kill for a Diet Mt. Dew right now.

    Try eating fruit for your "sweet" cravings. Hang in there!

    Reply
  5. Chelsea Gour says

    March 3, 2010 at 11:20 PM

    I got nothing but admiration for you since I'm not even observing Lent in this way. At least you're trying, right? But, I do have some advice in the sweets department. We changed our diets years ago to cut out sweets (for the most part). We found that the more fruit in our diets, the less we craved sweets. And, at night, when we would normally have a desert….I started throwing a bunch of frozen fruit in the blender with orange juice and serving that. It really worked! A cup of OJ or other juice, a banana, 5-6 large frozen strawberries (more if they are small), several scoops of frozen blueberries, some frozen mangoes and peaches and voila! Very healthy smoothie desert! Mix it up and try acacia berry juice or pomegranate juice and switch the berries around. Do raspberries and blackberries. Don't like banana, leave it out! Try it. I think you will be surprised at how little you will crave other sweets when you get enough natural sugars. And, I know you will be surprised to learn that we lost weight doing this. Another added benefit was that we, kids included, get sick less often. Most likely from all the antioxidants in those berries!

    Reply
  6. Terynn says

    March 4, 2010 at 12:17 AM

    I've never "done" Lent, but I have fasted as part of a Spirit-led faith builder.

    The thing that gets me through a rumbly tummy or craving for something I've sworn off for a season (or hours) is, every time I crave, growl, am tempted, etc., I say to the Lord in my spirit, "I pray that I would only crave You" or "I pray that I would be hungry for You", etc. Seems to work for me. Keeps me focused on why I thought this was a good idea in the first place.

    Hang in there. The Lord is pleased. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  7. The Gang's Momma! says

    March 4, 2010 at 12:46 AM

    Ugh. First time around was fuller of typos than I can handle. Here's my try again!

    I'm not participating in Lenten but look at this:

    "Anyone who meets a testing challenge head-on and manages to STICK IT OUT is mighty fortunate. For such persons loyally in love with God, the reward is LIFE and MORE LIFE." (Caps mine) from James 1:12 in The Message.

    I found this verse yesterday, as I've been feeling all out of sorts in my spirit since my friend passed away two weeks ago. I have had the hardest time focusing on daily tasks, worshiping, praying, and being in the Word. Fighting through all the emotions that his suicide left behind has been harder than I'd imagined.

    But the thing that stuck out to me about this verse is NO WHERE does it say "COME THROUGH THE TEST WITH FLAMING EXCELLENCE AND GRANDEUR." No, it says, "STICK IT OUT." That was my Facebook status on Tuesday. I'm STICKING IT OUT. That's all I can do right now and that's what I'm shooting for.

    Takes the pressure for perfection or excellence off. Especially when you STICK THE LANDING and then, look what Ephesians 6:13+ says (also in The Message):

    "Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out."

    Hang in there. Keep on Keeping On. Stick it out. Take all the help you can get. And pray. Pray. Pray!

    Reply
  8. 3 Peanuts says

    March 4, 2010 at 12:48 AM

    Stef,

    I have been finding myself thinking of things I "need" to buy too. But I put myself in God's arms and pray or read the Bible. I literally say out loud, Jesus please fill me with your peace. I do think that Lenten sacrifices can bring us so much closer to God. As long as we do not focus on what we are missing out on.

    Praying you through this..you CAN do it.

    Kim

    Reply
  9. Susan says

    March 4, 2010 at 1:26 AM

    You know Stefanie, Guacamole IS made out of avocadoes…so…you know..that one could be forgiven. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  10. Patricia/NYC says

    March 4, 2010 at 1:51 AM

    I totally slipped up & felt miserable…but then, at Mass last Sunday, our pastor said something wonderful… he said it's not about "giving up" coffee, chocolate, sweets, etc., things that are disconnected to the real reason of the season…it's about looking into your heart & soul, & giving up selfish desires, unkind thoughts, pride, gossip, etc…it's about making your heart more in line with Jesus…it's about carving out a specific time to pray & lay those earthly weaknesses at His feet…now THAT spoke to me & has made me more aware of my actions on a day to day basis.

    When I look at it that way, I think to myself…hmmmm, ok, do I REALLY need to give into my weaknesses, whatever they may be? And honestly, it gets me thinking in the right direction!

    Hope that helps!!!
    Hang in there, my friend!!!
    XOXO
    Patricia

    Reply
  11. Ellie says

    March 4, 2010 at 2:21 AM

    yeh, I hit the wall yesterday too. I'm at the point where I'm remembering how trying to give something up in no way makes me in better standing with God. It just makes me disciplined. I think in the back of my mind there is an idea that I will be in some more spiritual place the whole time . . . Thanks for the update, I'm with you.

    Reply
  12. Kristi says

    March 4, 2010 at 4:57 AM

    I would get some sugar free instant pudding ….wouldn't that be allowed??
    My husband and I just downed an entire box of banana cream a couple of weeks ago with a sliced banana thrown in and it was GREAT!!

    By the way, thinking of you as you seek answers concerning adorable Vivi. Please try to cast your worries aside. I see a spark of life in your girl that says, "bring it on!" …She's sassy and spunky and a fighter. She's going to be just fine no matter what. In fact, she's going to continue to thrive! Just like my precious daughter, who refuses to let the odds predict her future.

    Reply
  13. Aus says

    March 4, 2010 at 11:42 AM

    Morning Stef – I spent 7 years in the Franciscan Seminary and a lot of that is for a post on our blog – but directly to your 'issue'…. As a Franciscan I learned a lot about Service, Suffering, and Sacrifice. All good things – in particular from someone that is spending their live in service to the Lord and their community. BUT – a wise Franciscan once told me this….

    Sleep, Solititude, and Silence – those are the ways to let the Lord into your thoughts and life.

    There's nothing wrong with your Lenten sacrifice – but when it's an 'issue' for you – that's when it's time for you to get alone for a minute and find some quiet so that you can 'hear' what it is that has 'triggered' that desire in you.

    Not easy with small kids, a house, a spouse, and all the needs that those things demand. Requires something of a lifestyle change maybe – a 'time out' for mom or something – but that's the idea behind a Lenten sacrifice….learning – and hopefully holding on to for the rest of the year and your life – that lifestyle change. That way you're ready for the temtations that will follow someday….

    You're cool – God's good with it and with you – just look for the 'big picture' and go from there!

    hugs – aus and co.

    Reply
  14. Kim says

    March 4, 2010 at 1:16 PM

    Well, mine is a little stupid, I must admit, so here it goes- no rumor queen. Spending way too much time there and getting sucked in!Every morning I place our waiting daughter in His hands just to get discouraged and disappointed after the course of one days's events- you know,a waiting parents nightmares about what could happen or what is not happening,etc. So, rather than keeping up with everyine else, I need to spend more time praying for our adoption and especially for peace.
    But… I do check in for just a minute before I go to bed!

    Reply
  15. Holly says

    March 4, 2010 at 5:03 PM

    Hi Stef! Just back from a wonderful winter retreat up at Lake Tahoe with my hubby back from Iraq! Yippee! I too have struggled with fasting. I used to fast every Monday with the focus intended on intercession for children…especially the orphans of the world. Sounds great but it got to a point where I was just going through the motions and my mind was not sharp and I was not focusing on the prayer aspect, just on the denial of food and I ended up giving up the Monday fasts altogether.
    I have discovered that there is SUCH a spiritual battle over true fasting for breakthrough. The enemy does NOT want to see breakthrough and so he puts up quite a fight. That mixed with our flesh, well, it's a tough one to overcome.
    I encourage you to press on…and there may be days when you just feel like it is pointless, but don't give in. This is a gift from your heart to the Father and He will reward you!
    And if you slip up, get back on your feet and start again ๐Ÿ™‚
    This is your gift to Him….let that thought spur you on. You can do it!
    Love,
    Holly

    Reply
  16. julia says

    March 4, 2010 at 8:08 PM

    this a non-lenten question for ya…can you email me and let me know your thoughts/experiences w/wacap? i've been viewing their wc list and am considering using them as our agency. would you recommend them? any info would be helpful! we used agc last time. loved them but now wondering if a larger agency might be better? or worse? can't decide. julia. ajkanschmidt{at}yahoo.com

    Reply
  17. Michelle says

    March 4, 2010 at 10:20 PM

    So, while reading blogs yesterday I checked in on one of my favorites – and she had a link to this blog http://www.memoriesoncloverlane.blogspot.com. I started reading … and just kept on reading (kinda like I did when I came upon your blog.) Since I don't have any real good advice on how to survive the Lenten season, maybe Sarah's words can give you some encouragement. (Read down a few postings …February 25 is about going sugar free.) Hang in there!

    Reply
  18. Karin says

    March 5, 2010 at 3:45 AM

    I struggle with the same thing. I'm no help, huh? The struggle with fasting got so dreadful that I ended up doing just short fasts from things like the computer (gasp!). I used the time to pray for the length of time I was giving up the computer. That worked for me a lot better than fasting from food. However, some say that I cheated and am not really fasting, so you might want to just disregard everything I said. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  19. Kris says

    March 5, 2010 at 3:22 PM

    there are no failures in Lent. :O)

    Aus said it best.

    Reply
  20. Kristi says

    March 6, 2010 at 12:01 PM

    Stefanie,
    Lent "snuck up" on me this year (I'm using being in China as my excuse), but last year my husband and I had been feeling gentle nudges from God that he had something big for our lives. We felt sure it had something to do with orphans, but couldn't see the greater picture. So as Lent approached, we decided to give up sweets (and I'm a total "choc-a-holic") and I also gave up Facebook which had been a total time waster for me. And every time one of the urges came, I stopped to pray that God would reveal His plan for us as it came to orphans. During that season we stumbled upon Lifeline and their waiting child list and long story short, our Lenten Miracle is sleeping off jet lag beside me in my bed right now.
    I so need to get my story together to submit to NHBO, but I think I'll wait until after Monday's opthomology appointment.

    Reply

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I'm Stefanie. Wife to one, mom to 13. Occasional blogger and t-shirt maker. Wannabe photographer and exerciser. Constant grace-needer and orphan advocator. more
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