• Home
  • About
  • Wild Olive Tees
  • No Hands But Ours
    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • RSS

Ni Hao Y'all

when east meets south

  • Ni Hao Y'all
  • Faith
    • my faith
  • adoption
    • special needs adoption
      • clubfoot
      • Down syndrome
      • dwarfism
    • shared list
    • advocating
  • family
    • Magnolia
    • Clementine
    • Tallula
    • Poppy
    • Esther
    • Vivienne
    • Shepherd
    • Jude
    • Isabelle
    • Sophie
    • Dalton
    • Asher
    • Zach
    • Victoria
  • Life
    • memory lane
    • what works for us
    • things I love
    • Q and A
    • marriage
    • cooking
    • celebrations
    • blogging
      • love others
      • kudos
  • photography
    • photography 101
    • Sunday Snapshot

buckle up. part 2.

There were several comments from my last post that were put off by the first sentence, “If you’re not a Christian, this post is not for you.” Even under the fire of those who choose to call that sentence un-Christian, I’m not retracting it. I’ve thought about it a lot. I meant it. And I still mean it.

I am not speaking to the world at large. I am speaking to those who call themselves Christians. To those who follow the teaching of the Bible. Those who follow after Christ. And of those Christians, I’m specifically speaking to those who have been called to care for the orphan. Although I personally believe that all Christians fall under this category – the Bible makes it clear.

“Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the orphan. Fight for the rights of widows.” ~ Isaiah 1:17

I’m not talking to Buddhists. Or Muslims. Or Atheists. Because I’m talking to Christians.

Why? Because I can only talk about what I know. And where I’ve been. And what I’ve experienced personally. And I can only assume to speak to those with whom I share a common worldview, and a common purpose in life: to glorify Jesus.

I know our family isn’t the only Christian family He has called to adopt. We’re don’t possess some special dose of faith. Or an extra measure of patience or goodness or endurance. We’re just regular people, called by an extraordinary Jesus.

Another reason I am specifically not speaking to non-Christians is that I can not personally recommend adoption for those who are not called. Undoubtedly, there are many wonderful adoptive parents out there who are not Christian. There are quite a few that I know personally. But I was making a general statement on my personal, yet very public blog… I have no idea who the audience might be on any given day. I wouldn’t walk into WalMart and tell everyone in the store they needed to adopt a child. That would be ludicrous. Why? Because chances are, they’re not up to the task. And that’s no good for the parent and certainly no good for the child.

But if I were standing in a room filled with Christians whose hearts had been pricked for the orphan, you can bet I’d tell them to get moving! Start obeying the call! Go help care for the orphan! Why? How can I be so bold? Because I know that those that Jesus has called, He will equip.

A quote I love and often cling to is, “God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.” So true.

The other issue that was raised by “Anonymous” referred to Christianity. Here is the portion of her comment that I really did not understand. And that got me thinking….

**”Your very first sentence in this post is so very un-Christian. Do you mean to suggest that a Muslim could not feel strongly towards orphaned children? A Jew? A Buddhist? An Atheist? A member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster? In nearly all of the religions I mentioned above, and those I neglected to mention, the core of beliefs encourage, no demands!”**

If that first sentence is ‘so very un-Christian’, I’m curious… what would be the ‘Christian’ thing to say? Kum ba ya?

The ‘world’ has watered down the real Jesus into an “I’m okay, you’re okay” kind of a guy. Or as Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church says, “a soft-spoken, effeminate, marginalized, Galilean hippie-peasant in a dress…”

He most definitely is not that.

Judge of the Living and the Dead. Acts 10:42

Head of all Principality and Power. Colossians 2:9-10

Author of Eternal Salvation. Hebrews 5:8-10

He came for the sinner, the broken, the battle-scarred. And He came to set the ‘captives’ free, all of us. Because He loves us.

But because He loves us doesn’t mean He has no expectations of us.

“That servant who knows his master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” ~ Luke 12:47-48

It is because He loves us, that He has expectations of us.

And rightfully so.

The definition for ‘demand’:

de·mand

1. to ask for with proper authority; claim as a right.

2. to ask for peremptorily or urgently.

3. to call for or require as just, proper, or necessary.

A synonym for demand is command.

“Those who obey my commandments are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them, and I will love them. And I will reveal myself to each one of them.“ ~ John 14:21

Of course, we all have free will to obey or not. God’s great act of love for us gives us the freedom to turn away from Him. Or turn toward Him. Many of us choose not to obey, but Jesus makes it clear what He expects of us. Other times we will try but fall short, I know I do on a daily basis. He is the only One who lived a blameless life. But we are expected to strive toward the goal of being more like Him.

Thankfully, He accepts us in our shortcomings and loves us in our failures, even in our broken undeserving state. And it is out of this indebtedness and gratitude for His grace and mercy that our desire to obey grows.

When Jesus ‘demands’ things of us, it is not in a forceful, gruff and unloving way. He demands things of us in the way that a loving mother implores her child not run into the street after a play toy. Or a father pleads with his child to come home after a long absence. His demands of us are for our own good. To bring us closer to Him and help us reflect His glory more and more.

Many of these demands, or ‘commands’ are found in the New Testament. These commands are all rooted in a single foundation – love. Because He first loved us, we are able to love. Because we love Him, we are able to extend His love to others.

To be honest, I am truly grateful for this ‘discussion’. When I posted this yesterday, it was just something on my heart, and I didn’t want to miss an opportunity to nudge someone who might be wavering or questioning. I had no intention of stirring up a heated debate. And all the reading, thinking and praying I’ve done since then has helped me clarify (at least a bit more) where our family stands on adoption.

And more importantly, Jesus.

“But make sure in your hearts that Christ is Lord. Always be ready to give an answer to anyone who asks you about the hope you have. Be ready to give the reason for it. But do it gently and with respect.” ~ 1Peter 3:15

 

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • More
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
«
»

04.28.10 · adoption, buckle up, my faith 63

Comments

  1. Jenny says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:11 PM

    Can I just say that I absolutely adore you. You're doing great things on this personal and, thank goodness, very public blog.
    God bless you.

    Reply
  2. Rachel says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:17 PM

    AMEN SISTA!!!! I couldn't agree with you more!!

    Reply
  3. Maggie S says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:22 PM

    Headed out to acquire a copy of the book. You said what you meant to say yesterday… Some people go through life looking for offense and conflict.

    You didn't say people of other faiths wouldn't make adoptive parents…you delivered a call to action to those who are ignoring their marching orders if they ignore the plight of the orphan. That may not be addressed in other religious documents and since you weren't familiar with those, you spoke only to what you had knowledge of. Truly a rare commodity in today's confused and searching world.

    Sorry to run off at the keyboard.

    Reply
  4. Stephanie says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:22 PM

    The truth….not always palatable….but still the TRUTH. I am so grateful for women like you Stefanie! Thank you for responding to God' call on your life…for adoption and the ministries you pour yourself into.

    Reply
  5. Sherri says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:26 PM

    I get what you are saying here! It is almost as if people are surprised when we say that there is ONE way! He is the ONLY WAY and I wouldn't encourage non-Christians to adopt because I care about the soul of those children and I want them to be placed in a home that will lead them to Christ. I am tired of trying to be "Politically Correct" I would rather be "Biblically Correct!" We should reach out in love to non-Christians but we do not have to accept anything that they try to sell us. The only thing I am buying is Christ crucified, and raised from the dead, sitting on the right hand of the ONE TRUE GOD making intercession for me! I believe he is coming back just like he said and in that day, that moment of resurrection the ONLY thing that will matter is what you did with JESUS because we all do something with him, we reject him or we accept him. By doing nothing we still reject him! After we accept him we are COMMANDED to obey him. That is being a true Christian…losing ourselves in Christ. Paul said it best in Philippians 1:21 “For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain” once we are saved it is not us who live it is Christ who lives through us! That is why we must care for the orphans and the widows and why we must obey his commands! Great post!!

    Reply
  6. Katherine says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:31 PM

    Thank you for being utterly unashamed of the Gospel, and willing to clearly lay it all out there on the line–even when such a stance may make you a "fool" in the eyes of some. Wish I could sit down across from you with a cup of coffee to discuss all you're learning! Coming to China anytime soon? 🙂

    Reply
  7. Tami says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:38 PM

    Standing with you Stefanie…you are truly a blessing!!

    Your words may be making some uncomfortable, a bit defensive, maybe angry….but they are also, without a doubt, getting MANY to think about what you've said and ACT in whatever way God is leading their heart.

    God is good:-).

    Tami

    Reply
  8. Emily says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:43 PM

    you go!!!!!!! well thought out and i totally agree! i love that– He doesn't call the qualified– He qualifies the called– otherwise we'd be doing it in OUR strength and taking credit for it– instead of doing it in HIS strength and giving HIM the glory He deserves. It's not about us- but HIM:)

    Reply
  9. Cindy M says

    April 28, 2010 at 1:59 PM

    Well, Stefanie, most things "cook" best when you stir the pot a bit. I am encouraged by your willingness to be bold!! I totally agree! As we begin (well, it's been a work in progress in our hearts for a while now) to visibly work on our next adoption, I fully expect the questions and comments…"aren't you too old?" will probably top the list(44, by the way). We even ask ourselves how we will raise the money, how we will swing our older kids in college with younger ones at home, etc. But the one question I can't make peace with is, "Can I say no to God?" If all He asks of me is to love another little one, can I possibly say no? NO WAY. Nothing in THIS world is worth saying no. The greatest commandment is to love. Period.

    Another thing…I read most of the comments on the last post. Here are my thoughts and opinions, based on my experience and the revelations God has made to me. NO, abandonment is not God's design. But He promises to bring beauty from ashes, to use ALL things to the glory of His kingdom. He does not make mistakes. He knew before time that Caroline would be our daughter. Because He knew the circumstances of her birth far before she was born. He allowed those circumstances because He allows us to make our own choices on earth. He allows free will. In every country. On every continent. EVERY child has a family. Our obedience to His plan determines whether those children find their families. I know and believe this through the love He has shown me in the privilege of loving my daughter. I know HIM and His heart more fully by loving her.

    And it doesn't mean every Christian has to adopt. The numbers change all the time…as the numbers of orphaned children go UP all the time…but it's been said that if something like 7 PERCENT of evangelical Christians adopted, there would virtually be no orphans.

    Reply
  10. Patricia/NYC says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:04 PM

    Right beside you, my friend!!!
    What an eloquent post!! YOU ROCK!!!

    Reply
  11. Randi says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:05 PM

    Awesome post!!!!!

    Reply
  12. Nicole says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:12 PM

    I love your heart. You are an inspiration. The simple truth is something you can talk about because you are living it. When someone lives it, they need not necessarily say it, though they have more of a right to say it! I think it causes conviction in those who are Christian or those who are not, and is where the debate comes in. It isn't really a debate so much as those dealing with that conviction. At least that is what I see! Keep it up, I will still be reading 🙂

    Reply
  13. mom2three says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:16 PM

    love it!! Standing with you as are so many of your sisters are too.

    Reply
  14. Kim says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:19 PM

    AMEN SISTER!
    Thank you for your example. You are a powerful voice AND an action hero in this blog community. Thank you for not watering down the TRUTH.
    You walk the talk Stefani with head knowledge, heart truth, and hands and feet in action! With the strength of your knowledge and through the lens of your experience, you are inspiring others to respond to God's commands.
    Love & Blessings from Hong Kong,
    Kim

    Reply
  15. Jen & Bill says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:24 PM

    First I believe people should adopt no matter what their religion is. It is about the welfare of the child.

    from Sherri- "He is the ONLY WAY and I wouldn't encourage non-Christians to adopt because I care about the soul of those children and I want them to be placed in a home that will lead them to Christ. I am tired of trying to be "Politically Correct" I would rather be "Biblically Correct!" We should reach out in love to non-Christians but we do not have to accept anything that they try to sell us"

    This is truely unbelieveable. Your home is better than my home because your Christian and I'm Jewish. Thank g-d I don't have accept anything you try to sell me either. This is the problem – the true lack of respect for others people faith and the need to say your way is the only way.

    Reply
  16. Tesseraemum says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:28 PM

    You go girl!! As with anything if we go into it under our own power and good intentions we will not be successful. Only giving up our agenda and letting the Lord work through us will give us a fighting chance.– Maybe saying God meant for a child to be with you and not their biological parent is not right for all adoptees. But,we live in a fallen world and people make choices and God was there to pick them up and HE chose their family and intends for this to be a part of their story. It is just one piece of who they are. We are all broken and only God can fill those dark places. A house and a bed and a parent no matter how great cannot do that. We have to be a willing instrument in His grand plan! Adoption is not the END of the story for these kids it is just one piece of their "special, set apart, chosen by God, mysterious, exciting life" We can only do our best to raise them to know God's amazing power so they can go out and be a willing instrument…. Sheri

    Reply
  17. Ladyblog says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:38 PM

    Great post! Truth is not always easy but it is necessary.

    Reply
  18. chavafor4 says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:42 PM

    Stephanie,
    Very good post. I posted a long response yesterday but it got lost in cyberspace. The bible says that what we say will sound like gibberish to unsaved ears. They will reject that Jesus is the ONLY way to heaven and we will be persecuted for it. Although I in no way shape or form desire persecution, I will never reject the one who died for me, saved me, gives me a peace that passes all understanding, forgives me when I screw up and loves me so much He died for me. He died for my children and He is the only one that will give them peace about there adoption. That is my prayer every day for them. And I pray that those who do not know the Saviour will feel that prick in their heart, the knock on the door from Christ asking to come into there lives. Christ will do that, but only you can open it. Its up to you, and when you feel that nudge, do put it off. And if God is calling you to adopt, step out in faith. He will bless you for it.

    Reply
  19. Kim says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:46 PM

    Amen, Stephanie! I was listening on the radio how as a Christians (born-again) we live in a culture where we need to watch what we say about Jesus because we may affend someone else. Baloney! Sorry that was rough :), but I will speak of my Jesus…who He is…what He has done for me and everyone….what His word says….how to live your life for Him….what He wants us to do….I won't water-down His word for anything. Ok, I am finished. 🙂
    Another note…I agree not all Christians are called to adopt, but to pray, give, serve, the orphans and the widows. No questions…He said it and it needs to be done. Because He is the King of Kings and we are His children called by Him for a purpose. Love it! Keep it coming :).

    Reply
  20. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:52 PM

    the post that Stefanie wrote was intended for Christians only, she prefaced that. Christans are "christ like", followers of Christ and his teaching. He said in John 14:6 "I am the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father except thru me". If I call myself a Christian then I accept the teaching in John 14:6. Jesus is the only way to God, and He is the truth, and the life.
    If you do not accept this teaching, then you are not a Christian.

    If that offends you then you are offended by his teaching.

    Reply
  21. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:53 PM

    Hey Stephanie, I just want you to know that I agree with you %100. Great post. Christy

    Reply
  22. Aus says

    April 28, 2010 at 2:58 PM

    Morning Stephanie – I enjoyed the posts from yesterday and today – and I guess I just 'missed' any controversy….unless of course….the 'issues' were being felt by those who were 'resisting the call'. Sometimes that 'causes' a lot of uneasyness in folks! 😉

    As for the first sentence of yesterday's post being 'unChristian' – I didn't get that either – you were simply addressing a specific group of folks in the world – your blog – and nothing wrong with that either.

    Great stuff – hugs –

    aus and co.

    Reply
  23. Lost and Found says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:01 PM

    Sherri,
    your post is unsettling, disrespectful and all too assuming that because you are Christian, you are above anyone else. I am Jewish and single and my daughter is just as loved as any other family that would have adopted her. She wasn't saved or rescued or a mission to accomplish. She was a child that nobody wanted and was tossed in a box and I was willing to travel around the world to become her mother. I worked hard to pay for my adoption despite the $5k of dental work the 2 months before and the accident which totaled my car the month before. There were no grants, no knowledge that my adoption would be provided by the work other than which came from my two hands.

    I respect people of all faiths because I believe god would want me to demonstrate my morals, values and good old fashioned respect. I don't need someone to reach out to me in love because their bible tells them to but rather to be my neighbor, friend, mate because they chose to be. Suggesting that non Christians have an agenda is not only nonsense but again, disrespectful. As much as I am a NON-Christian I am moved by people who found their place in the world through their faith. I have friends who are atheist, Jewish, born again Christian, Catholic, Muslim, etc. We come together to discuss our similarities and differences with respect to each other's beliefs. I can only hope we continue to grow our village with people who love and support us that do not have an agenda of their own.

    Reply
  24. One Happy Momma says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:19 PM

    Once again, I have noticed that non-Christians are the one getting their knickers in a bunch.

    Thank you again Stefanie for clarifying this is about what you know as a Christian woman speaking to Christians!

    Thank you for not apologizing for your faith!

    Blessings and hugs –

    Cathy

    Reply
  25. connie says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:28 PM

    The Truth is still the Truth, no matter how much we comfortable, complacent, imperfect beings try to water it down and make it fit our lifestyle. Can't deny the one and only Truth, praise God! This discussion is awesome because it gives us a chance to reflect and ask God (that would be the One and Only Living God) to search our hearts and reveal His Truth to us. Amen, Sister!

    Reply
  26. Jen & Bill says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:28 PM

    I have no issues with Stephanie's original post. If you have been called by Jesus to adopt – bravo.

    The problem comes from the you are right and I'm wrong mentality. It is disrespectful to tell me that the soul of my child is lost because he is being raised Jewish.

    Reply
  27. Paula says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:37 PM

    you have a nice way of wording things. thank you for your boldness and your gift of writing…it must come from the Savior!

    Reply
  28. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:48 PM

    "The problem comes from the you are right and I'm wrong mentality. It is disrespectful to tell me that the soul of my child is lost because he is being raised Jewish"

    I do not know what your child is being taught. If you are a Christian you agree with Christ's teachings, and in John 14:6 Jesus is quoted as saying to his disciples "I am the Way, the truth and the life, no person comes to the Father except thru me." He didn't say he was one way but THE way.

    In the old testament there is scripture that reads… "There is a way that seems right to a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. " So, it doesn't matter what we may FEEL is right for us, but we as Christians have to look into what Christ taught as truth. If he says he is the only way, then that is what we believe, and we are not ashamed to agree with and accept his teaching on this.

    Reply
  29. chavafor4 says

    April 28, 2010 at 3:52 PM

    It is not that you are wrong and Stephanie is right. It is that Stephanie asked Jesus Christ into her life and is saved in Christ, because He died on the cross and rose the third day. I do know that most jewish people do not believe this, but I do know some who do. A child that is young is saved because they are under the age of accountability, but when they are old enough to understand they will have to make a decision just like you will have to. It is not to be mean or to say "we are better than you". Not that at all. In fact the bible says He wishes none would perish. I know in todays political correct society it is not correct to say there is only way to Heaven, but that is what the bible says. John 14:6 Jesus said unto him "I am the way, the truth and the life; no one comes to the Father, but through me." If you died today, do you believe you are going to heaven without a doubt? I do and I can help you to understnad that if you would like. It is not because I am better than you, it is because I care about those people who do not understand because today could be the day that Jesus comes back or you die in a car accident. We just dont know.

    Reply
  30. Lost and Found says

    April 28, 2010 at 4:35 PM

    As someone who posted in response, I actually found Stefanie's post to be great. She speaks her mind, her pride, devotion and love of being a Christian family and that is wonderful. I applaud her for being willing to speak her mind of topics that aren't always easy. If you feel called to adopt by Jesus that IS wonderful. I felt called to adopt by my internal being. I wanted to be a mother and there are children without parents. For me the equation was simple. However for others to suggest if you are not Christian you are beneath it all is not only ignorant but disrespectful. Not only am I Jewish but my partner of three years is Catholic. Actually he comes from a family of practicing Catholics who attend church daily and believe and welcome Jesus into their lives. My daughter and I are Jewish. We are welcomed into their family, their hearts and included in all celebrations and honors, including Christmas which is when they celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. As non-Christians, we respectfully honor them by our presence and participation as guests in their home. They know we are who we are and we respect one another. If the belief is as some have suggested, that means that Christians should only surround themselves with other Christians and those who believe only as they do. If a child is born to a non-Christian, are they any less valuable?

    Reply
  31. Jen & Bill says

    April 28, 2010 at 4:41 PM

    Again I never said Stephanie was wrong.
    I respect her passion for adopting.

    Chavafor4 – To answer your question – If I did die today, I know beyond a doubt I will go to Heaven.

    Reply
  32. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 5:09 PM

    I do not see anywhere in these comments by christians that 'if you are not Christian, then you are beneath it all". Nor do I see any comments that are disrespectful of another's beliefs. If you want to belive a certain belief that is your choice. As a Christian, I cannot accept any other belief apart from Christ's teachings. I can accept the person, but not the belief. It all boils down to our belief in what Christ has taught. If He says He is the only way to Heaven, than I accept that and believe it. You can love someone without accepting their beliefs as truth though.

    Reply
  33. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 5:13 PM

    thank you for sharing your heart… unapologetically.
    i am always amazed by people's anger towards personal blogs – especially in relation to Christ and adoption.
    please know you have been an encouragement & blessing to us and many other anonymous viewers.
    your brother & sister in Christ, JD2

    Reply
  34. Lost and Found says

    April 28, 2010 at 5:40 PM

    I don't see anger, I see ignorance. Saying that children should only be adopted by Christians is disrespectful. Those other than who believe that jesus is their savior have the capacity to love a child and be a moral parent. I applaud people and value them for their beliefs even when they are not mine nor do I walk around with "Jew" on my agenda. Religion is personal (to me) and need not be an issue. Praise for who/what you believe in is great. To Anonymous, I think telling someone they are going to hell for being a non=Christian is pretty disrespectful but perhaps our values are different. Again, my comments having zero to do with Stefanie's post and more about the commenters. I think discussions about things like this are good when respectful. they help educate one another about the rest of the world, the differences and similarities we all share. I may not be Christian but I'm an adoptive parent, a supporter of our military, an advocate for children with special needs which I share in common with many of my Christian peers.

    Reply
  35. Anonymous says

    April 28, 2010 at 6:13 PM

    Lost and Found,

    I do agree with you that non-Christians have the capacity to love a child and be a moral parent.

    Sherry did not say only Christians should adopt. She said she is not going to encourage non-Christians to adopt based on her personal beliefs.

    Yes, our values are different. What you would think as disrespectful I would consider caring about someone's destination after death. And it is all in the attitude and intent of the person. You can state your belief about hell in a disrespectul way AND you can state your personal belief about hell in a very caring way. I consider Christ sharing about heaven and hell in a caring way when he was here on earth and not in any way was he disrespectful when he shared truth.

    Reply
  36. Charlene says

    April 28, 2010 at 6:15 PM

    Being moral and good doesn't get you to heaven…. According to my bible, if you are not a Christian–believe that Jesus is THE ONLY way to heaven, that He died for each and every one of us as the perfect sacrifice, that He is your Lord and Savior, then you are destined for hell. It's a harsh truth.

    Doesn't mean I can't be your friend, love you, and respect you, but it would mean that my heart would ache for you. If you're sister was headed down the path of destruction, wouldn't you want to save her? If you knew she was walking into death, wouldn't you be blunt and cut to the chase? That is how I feel about my friends–in person and online. I don't have to preach the gospel to them, but I sure hope that I am living it out for them to see and draw them close to the heart of God. He loves each of us so much.

    Reply
  37. Kris says

    April 28, 2010 at 6:18 PM

    "Once again, I have noticed that non-Christians are the one getting their knickers in a bunch".

    i am a christian and respectfully disagree with the first post (Buckle Up). that's a lot to assume.

    Reply
  38. Barbie says

    April 28, 2010 at 6:41 PM

    Thank you Stefanie! It is hard to stand firm but I admire you for it. Today the least tolerated group of people is Jesus following Christians. And I say it that way because unfortunately the word Christian has been so distorted. I think so many are truly lost while they are clinging to the word Christian. I so wish others could understand what it feels like to be a follower of Jesus Christ. How is can change your life. We are not here to judge. But to give others the same hope. But they have to want it and not all do. Some will hear the truth and choose to ignore it. But what a celebration when someone chooses Him!!

    Reply
  39. Rebecca says

    April 28, 2010 at 7:39 PM

    This is a nice post. Thanks~

    If you're reading this, please keep my family in your prayers. Especially my little boy, who will undergo an MRI on Friday to see if there is an optic glioma growing on his optic nerve.

    Reply
  40. chavafor4 says

    April 28, 2010 at 8:04 PM

    Rebecca, I will be praying for you and your son. Jenne

    Reply
  41. Robin says

    April 28, 2010 at 9:12 PM

    As Christians we must stand firm in a world that does want to mold God into what fits their own personal lives. Bless you for being bold and standing firm!

    My prayer is for orphans and that the hearts of unbelievers will also be pricked and come to know Christ as we do.

    Keep writing when something is stirred that means folks are listening and your words may be they very thing that pricks their heart.

    Blessings to you and your sweet family,
    Robin

    Reply
  42. Desiree' says

    April 28, 2010 at 9:16 PM

    You go girl, tell it like it is and make NO apologies!!

    Reply
  43. Julie says

    April 28, 2010 at 9:25 PM

    Stephanie, Amen. I love your post and it's message. I agree that not every Christian is called to adopt, but we are called to care for the orphan. My eyes were opened recently to the plight of the orphans. I am sponsoring one orphan now but am still looking for ways to help. I love your blog and the passion that you have. Thank you for being so bold and being that voice that is so badly needed.

    In Christ's Love,
    Julie

    Reply
  44. Lost and Found says

    April 28, 2010 at 9:59 PM

    Charlene, you said something important. "According to your bible….." I respect that. It's also not my bible. The rest of this statement is not directed to you per se. I do not preach to others about my religious beliefs because it's personal and it's not for me to convince others that their path is wrong. I can respect that if your bible tells you the only way to heaven is though following Christ, know that is your belief and you should be proud of it. However, others are also following their bible which may dictate something which differs. I am far more concerned with how I spend my life on earth than what will happen to me at the end.

    Reply
  45. Charlene says

    April 28, 2010 at 10:55 PM

    "I am far more concerned with how I spend my life on earth than what will happen to me at the end."

    But isn't that a sad and depressing thought? I might have 60-70 years here on earth and then that's it…? Having buried both my mom and dad in the past couple years (one I know was a believer and the other I don't honestly think was), I don't think the here and now are as important. This is just a blip on the timeline of eternity… And having Christ in me and in my life not only affects what will happen to me at the end, but TOTALLY affects how I spend my life on earth. It doesn't have to be one or the other… I guess I just don't understand how people (not you directly, but people in general) can NOT want the blessings and favor of God in your life. Not the physical, but the overwhelming and overflowing love of God….

    And isn't it selfish to not share with others when we think they're on the wrong path?

    I know I won't change anyone's mind, but it really does hurt my heart. I feel such a sense of ache and sadness for those who don't have the hope of eternity… that this is it.

    Thanks for the discussion, I do appreciate the chance to think through my beliefs and learn how to communicate them to others.

    Reply
  46. Sharon says

    April 28, 2010 at 11:19 PM

    Proud of you, Stefanie, for not backing down or apologizing. You are one awesome, God fearing mama and I am proud to call you my friend.

    Sharon

    Reply
  47. Lost and Found says

    April 29, 2010 at 12:21 AM

    Charlene,
    You are kind to entertain my thoughts. I think it's selfish not to share what you believe in your heart but it's only your perception (the proverbial you) that believes someone is on the wrong path. I don't have Jesus in my life but that doesn't mean I don't have god. It may be a different god or a different belief but I still have faith. I guess I want my life to matter today in the here and now. If you've ever read the poem, "the dash" that's how I feel. I want to be the best person I can every day on this earth and know in my heart when my time is up I'm going to the right place. I know we differ in our faith of what that place is and that's okay. I feel bad Stefanie's blog has had to endure all this banter but I do enjoy the dialogue with people like you who are able to have a dialogue without the inference of superiority.

    Reply
  48. Anonymous says

    April 29, 2010 at 12:37 AM

    Lost and Found,

    I echo most of what Charlene has said, and I also thank you for the dialogue!

    Reply
  49. Tara Anderson says

    April 29, 2010 at 12:41 AM

    Great job on BOTH posts…I think you were spot on!!! And I love "What Jesus Demands from the World"! An excellent book by one of my favorite authors! 🙂

    Reply
  50. Anonymous says

    April 29, 2010 at 1:22 AM

    Stefanie~
    Great posts!
    I wasn't offended at all, but then again, I'm a Christ follower!
    ~elizabeth

    Reply
  51. Jen says

    April 29, 2010 at 1:36 AM

    Your post pricked my heart, for sure. I have followed the adoption community for 4 years now, ever since we found out we have some genetic issues that complicate our ability to have biological kids. If my husband were willing, we'd be two years into the adoption process by now. He's just not there. I have prayed and fasted and ultimately I think my lesson here is to give it up to God. He's in charge, not me. And as someone who likes to be in charge, this is a hard lesson to learn. I pray there is an orphan in China for us some day, but for now, I continue to wait.

    Also, I think it's silly to be offended by your post. Seriously.

    Reply
  52. Cindy says

    April 29, 2010 at 2:05 AM

    Yay! I don't know you but I feel like we are soul-sisters! Thank you for what you do. I am a mother of a child with special needs and have spent a lot of time and effort advocating for God's "special" people. I have been called and equipped by the living God to do HIS work – just an ordinary mom. What a privilege. Keep up the great work.

    Reply
  53. Chris says

    April 29, 2010 at 12:29 PM

    When I grow up I want to be like you :^) Thanks for the "no apologies" post. We need more people like you.

    Reply
  54. Machell says

    April 29, 2010 at 3:00 PM

    Stefanie

    Way to go girl … great post!!!!

    This is for those who feel the call to adopt but haven't!!!

    Never back down from what you feel God is calling you to do. Satan would love nothing more than for all the orphans in the world to stay as orphans. But God has a greater plan. There are 380,000 churches in North America , 2.5 billion professing Christians worldwide and 147 million orphans … do the math … God has a plan and there are a lot of people who feel the call to adopt (because I have talked with many) and haven't because of many reasons and doubts (Satan is the creator of all doubt). God doesn't call the equipped HE equips the called. Look at Moses, Ester and David in the Bible … they could not do it on their own but with God's help they did. I know this for a fact, God has blessed our family with 3 children from China. WHen we first started praying about adoption we had lots of doubts … but 3 kids later I know for a fact that GOD can do it. Just take a step of faith and GOD will meet you. Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1 I know God is not calling all Christians to adopt but He is calling all Christians to act on behalf of all orphans it maybe to pray, to give financial help to a family that you know that is adopting or to just speak out for orphans. Speak up for those who can't speak for themselves. Proverbs 31:8
    So if you feel the call to adopt … please just take a step and God will meet you there.

    Until They all have homes … I will speak up!

    Machell

    Reply
  55. Melanie says

    May 1, 2010 at 2:03 AM

    I have enjoyed reading this discussion and posts. I agree that more Christian families and that God would call more christians to adopt. We have 3 bio children and now adopting our 3rd daughter from China. I agree with what you are saying Stephanie. It is about James : Be doers of the word and not just hearers. Christians are called to care for the widows and orphans in some way. 100% called and there is so much blessings in store when following God's call.
    I also want to address the Jewish commenters. No one is critizing their beliefs or saying theyare not equip to love their child or adopt. The point is that Jesus has commanded His Followers to care for the widows and orphans. Adoption is one way to fulfill that call. I am also curious how it is that Jews study the old testament and follow it and still after reading and studying the book of Isaiah do not see that Jesus of Nazereth is The Mesiah, Christ Jesus. Born from the Line of David and fulfills every prophesy in the Old testament. Jesus is the Saviour to the Jews and Gentiles Alike. I challenge that if you dispute this then study every prophesy concerning Jesus and try to disprove what the Bible Old testament and New testament says about Jesus. He is the Savior of the World. The Way, The Truth, and The Life. The I AM. Jehovah. He is. And one day, everyone in Heaven and Earth will have to declare that Jesus is Lord. Better now and have eternal life with Him and with God than later. And face eternity seperated from God. I am only saying what the Word of God says. He sent Jesus to seek and save the lost. I mean to say this without any disrespect. I have respect for Jews. I have had Jewish friends as well as non christian friends. I only want to communicate what the Word of God says…The Truth. There is absolute truth and it is not just my perception or your perception. One day we will all answer to The Truth. Whether we believed the Truth or not. Just sayin. Christians are freinds to the Jews and we pray for Jews and Isreal. We pray for te Peace of Isreal and we have a deep respect for Jews because after all…the Jewish people are God's Chosen people. May God open your eyes to the Truth of His Son Jesus and soften your heart. And Congrats on your adoption. Again…I mean no disrespect and I am just sayin. Hope you read and study and try to prove Jesus wrong. Try to prove your right. Study the Christian Bible King James or New King James version. Research Christian Jews and try to find The Truth for yourself. Again all the best to you and yours. Hope you take me seriously.

    Reply
  56. Kris says

    May 1, 2010 at 2:55 PM

    every single person on this planet: muslim, shinto, buddhist, jewish, christian, pagan, taoist… was created uniquely and is loved entirely by God.

    God is love. he does not condemn but forgives.

    New International Version (©1984)
    "For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him".

    if God himself does not condemn, why do you?

    this is the God i know. and last i checked, Jesus wasn't hanging out with the "do- gooders", but kept some pretty shady company. and i'm pretty sure he asked us not to judge one another. but maybe that sentence is only in my bible.

    ~ a Jesus following Christian (since Barbie needs the definition of Christian- "follower of Christ"- clarified).

    Reply
  57. Kris says

    May 1, 2010 at 3:15 PM

    i will add that my comment is directed at the universal "you", not stefanie herself or alone. i have tremendous respect for stefanie and her beliefs- which down to bare bones- are not that different from my own.

    what i find appalling in these comments is the frequent lack of respect for one another.

    as i said to stef in a private email: god created us in his likeness and image, therefore, he is the only one that can know us entirely- as we are. so who are we to be passing judgment on one another?

    i apologize to stef if she thought the comment above was directed at her. i assumed due to our friendship that she'd see it as universal, the way i intended.

    and i'm human. i can't always chuck my emotions aside. and seeing this kind of intolerance (in some of the comments) leaves me feeling hurt and angry.

    Reply
  58. 3 Peanuts says

    May 2, 2010 at 3:14 AM

    Stefanie,

    You are doing exactly what the Lord wants you to be doing. You are talking the talk and walking the walk. Thank you for giving me lots to think about and pray about. I enjoyed the dialogue.

    Reply
  59. Joan says

    May 2, 2010 at 6:22 PM

    I just had to step in again one more time. (and then I'll go away) It is great that this writer has so much support. I do respectfully want to disagree with the comment someone made about only non-Christians getting their knickers in a twist. I am a Christian and I find much of this dialogue quite disturbing. As John and Paul both stated in their writings, it is way better to walk the walk – to "preach the Gospel and sometimes actually use words." And that's great for everyone to want to do good. But that doesn't give Christians permission to be elitist. I believe that God is all-loving and all-forgiving. Jesus' commandment to love one another as He loves us doesn't have any stipulations about what man-made label someone has chosen. It's a pretty simple concept, and the hardest to actually live – love everybody. It is incredibly hard for all of His followers.
    As a reader, I would have to observe that if Stef chooses to publish her thoughts via blog on the interent, then she would be open to all responses. And initially I was quite impressed to see an open dialogue with several points of view. That would be the entire purpose of blogs and this community. But then it appears the author had some secomd thoughts? I read a long response by Raina before, well-written and thought-provoking, and yes it expressed a different belief. It seems to have vanished. Why? Censureship seems rather un-Christian. Not very loving or forgiving. And now you can all flame me up one side and down the other, if my post is allowed to stay. No person is fit to judge me as I am not fit to judge any of you – that would be God's job and maybe someday you'll leave it up to Him. -Joan

    Reply
  60. Barbie says

    May 3, 2010 at 6:06 PM

    Actually as Christians we are not to judge unbelievers. We are to lovingly confront those that confess Jesus Christ as their Saviour if they are not walking in the Truth, the word of God. We are not to judge them on OUR believes but on HIS truths.

    Reply
  61. Barbie says

    May 3, 2010 at 6:18 PM

    I want to add that I fall SO short! I know there are times I have a judgmental heart towards people I shouldn't but God is teaching me to love others in a way I never have before. It is awesome. And as Stefanie says, the Bible is very clear about caring for orphans, which I do but have been so convicted lately about the rest of that verse. Caring for the widows. It is easy to do the parts that we are passionate about and easier to let others do the rest. I forget I am called to all of it.

    I truly don't think Stef was trying to make this about 'religion' but about Christians who read their Bible and confess to believe it yet turn their eyes from doing it.

    Reply
  62. Kris says

    May 3, 2010 at 7:58 PM

    So well said Joan. Thanks for your input. I think these discussions are incredibly important. As Raina said today on her blog, and I believe this needs publication:

    "These are not necessarily voices of agreement, but they are voices in discussion. Thinking, questioning, answering, talking. That is how this gets done. One conversation at a time, we chip away at the mighty armor of ignorance, of racism, of group-think. That is how revolutions are started, how long overdue reforms are made. That is how we can achieve the impossible in the face of the insurmountable".

    Jesus Himself was a revolutionary. He defied every law of that time and reshaped the face of humanity. One conversation at a time. One healing at a time.

    Reply
  63. Jessica says

    May 4, 2010 at 7:44 PM

    I am a Christian. I believe in Jesus Christ and his teachings, and I applaud any family no matter what their faith that would take an orphan into their home and love them forever. There are so many orphans in this world. They need love and family. Will we let them sit a little longer until the "right" family comes along? I hope not.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

I'm Stefanie. Wife to one, mom to 13. Occasional blogger and t-shirt maker. Wannabe photographer and exerciser. Constant grace-needer and orphan advocator. more
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • RSS

Subscribe

instagram

see more...follow us on IG

our china journeys

magnolia - 2016
clementine - 2014
tallula - 2012
penelope - 2011
vivienne - 2010
shepherd - 2008
jude - 2007
sophie - 2006
isabelle - 2005

ways to make a difference

Love Project

proceed with caution

a dirty secret in adoption
we don't celebrate gotcha day
there's no such thing as an easy adoption
if I can, you can.
co-sleeping, why we do it.
gawsh. the series.
crazy
affording adoption
God and me.
Vivi's diagnosis
the ugly, beautiful truth
special needs: my .02
my testimony
dear anonymous
my chinese son

Creative Commons License

Copyright © 2023 · Darling theme by Restored 316

Copyright © 2023 · Darling Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.