My oldest child is 25. My youngest child is 1. And I am mama to 10 more that fall in between.
My 1 year old cannot feed herself. Hold her cup. Walk from one end of the room to the other.
I get to do all that for her.
My 25 year old, on the other hand, no longer needs much help. For anything.
In fact she can do basically anything I can do, and oftentimes does it better.
And somehow, mothering the child that is virtually independent can be as hard as mothering the child that is completely dependent.
I am learning that when it comes to parenting, letting go can be the hardest part.
Being mama to this boy – my biggest boy who just turned 20 years old – is in many ways harder now than when he was 2…
and fearlessly scaling the bookshelves…
asking his 4679th why? question of the day…
and bolting out of the front door and down the gravel driveway.
Because when he was scaling the bookshelf, I was there to catch him.
When he was asking questions, I was the one to answer.
When he was running barefoot up the driveway headed for the road, I was just one step behind him.
But now he’s big. Capable. And a whole lot further than one step away 95% of the time.
He doesn’t need his questions answered or his hand held like he did 18 years ago.
Mamas, squeeze your babies.
Because when they’re this big, they’re not quite as crazy about it. 
That doesn’t mean I don’t still try.
Happy 20th to you, my biggest boy. Whether you’re 15 pounds or 150, I’m so thankful I get to be the one you call mama.
I totally feel you in this post. Adult children are fabulous but parenting is very different.
Amen! I totally agree!
Beautiful post!!
I agree. Beautiful post!
Doing this later in life and starting at 41 … this gives me lots to think about. My oldest is 12 and it is already changing lots and I have to figure out creatively to get my momma moments with him. Eight years from now will be completely different.
So good for this young, tired mama to read. My littles are 5 months and 2 years and I often feel anxious for days where they aren’t quite so needy or fussy or not sleeping through the night … but I keep hearing how fast the years fly. Thanks for the reminder to enjoy the little years!
I only have 2, one that just turned 16 and one that is about to turn 18 and goes away to college this year. It’s killing me. I wish I could go back and do things better. I guess we probably all wish that. Happy birthday to your oldest boy. 🙂
So excited to have stumbled across your blog tonight. I love your family!!! We love adoption as well and are Christ followers as well.Even have Sophie in our family as well. Your photography is stunning! My Sophie wants to know how to levitate with balloons like that by the way. Ha!