Thanks to a whole new perspective, courtesy of The Big Guy, I am feeling much better. Rejuvenated, in fact (if that is possible). My good friend Laine sent me a fantastic Oswald Chambers devotional for the day on Tuesday. It really spoke to my heart. In fact, I had “My Utmost for His Highest” (Oswald Chambers’ daily devotional) on my desk, within an arm’s reach of my keyboard, but I had not read it in a long time. I opened it up on Wednesday and read this:
“. . . so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord Jesus.” Acts 20:24
Joy means the perfect fulfillment of that for which I was created and regenerated, not the successful doing of a thing. The joy Our Lord had lay in doing what the Father sent Him to do, and He says – “As My Father hath sent Me, even so am I sending you.” Have I received a ministry from the Lord? If so, I have to be loyal to it, to count my life precious only for the fulfilling of that ministry. Think of the satisfaction it will be to hear Jesus say – “Well done, good and faithful servant”; to know that you have done what He sent you to do. We have all to find our niche in life, and spiritually we find it when we receive our ministry from the Lord. In order to do this we must have companied with Jesus; we must know Him as more than a personal Saviour. “I will show him how great things he must suffer for My sake.”
“Lovest thou Me?” Then – “Feed My sheep.” There is no choice of service, only absolute loyalty to Our Lord’s commission; loyalty to what you discern when you are in closest contact with God. If you have received a ministry from the Lord Jesus, you will know that the need is never the call: the need is the opportunity. The call is loyalty to the ministry you received when you were in real touch with Him. This does not imply that there is a campaign of service marked out for you, but it does mean that you will have to ignore the demands for service along other lines.
God has reminded me of how this all began, in July 2004, when He spoke to my husband about a little girl in China. A little girl who was waiting for us, who, unbeknownst to us had probably just been born about that time. I was looking at our commission, to bring her home as well as our other children, as an event. A one time happening. What I realized in the last few days is that in that moment, God gave us a mission. A path to travel with our lives. Not for a moment or a month or a few years, but for a lifetime. Basically, until further notice π How cool is that? A mission to help, advocate for, speak up for, represent to the best of my abilities all the little ones who wait. Who wait for their turn. Does this mean I am to bring home four more kiddos? I don’t think so. But I do think He has a lot more planned for us to accomplish through Him. I have some suspicions about what He might call us to do in the future, but nothing definite. And how exciting is that? God calls us to a life of adventure, excitement and above all JOY! But the joy is not found in a ‘thing’ or an ‘event’ but in serving Him and finding ourselves being used as an instrument for His kingdom, His glory and His children!
So I am ashamed to say I was terribly focused on the small picture. The very very small picture. Our PA will come. Shepherd will be in my arms one day very soon. God started us on this path and I fully trust that He will bring Shepherd home in His timing. And then who knows? What I do know is that God wants me to enjoy the journey. Not miss the scenery as I’m trying to blaze through life with my hair on fire, running from one life event to another. Knuckles white from gripping onto the steering wheel so tightly. Wishing the time away in between. Missing opportunities to find joy in my family, my friends, and most of all my Savior. He wants me to savor every minute, the good and the bad, the easy as well as the difficult. There is much to be learned and enjoyed in all of it, it’s just a matter of changing my perspective to HIS perspective. What will be next on this journey? I can’t wait to find out π
sara says
I read a devotional once that spoke to me – it said something along the lines of ‘doing what it is God has called you to-UNTIL HE tells you to not do it anymore’! We should never take it upon ourselves to STOP doing the very things that bring God joy and ultimately US the same joy. Sister, I am along for the ride – growing in Christ myself as I watch you in your obedience!
Amie says
girl… You Rock. I am so glad to be along for the ride with you.. looking forward to seeing the big picture unfold!!
hugs!
π
Amie
The Ferrill's says
Love it love it love it!
“God calls us to a life of adventure, excitement and above all JOY! But the joy is not found in a ‘thing’ or an ‘event’ but in serving Him and finding ourselves being used as an instrument for His kingdom, His glory and His children!” Perfectly said. Amen to that. And I too look forward to following the journey of your family! We certainly know that what we think is the end is really just the beginning!
You continue to be such a blessing to me!
bytheriver says
thanks for the reminder- my focus has been on work, but in addition – B says i am anxious – he’s right. I have waited a long time, I want something to happen now with our new adoption option -but the reminder is good – if its meant to be, it will be in His time. You are right too, my head is filled with to do’s and organization, but those things are unimportant if they do not mesh with the right timing. Its not an event, but a process, a nudge in several directions. The process of living life, the process of caring for the kids we have, the process of finding Joy. Waiting quietly, missing old friends, wanting to see the new direction. Finding that the life i’d waited so anxiously for is now. No need to be anxious anymore. All things are possible.
Janelle says
what an honest and lovely post. it is so easy to get caught up in our smaller view.
thanks for sharing that.
Rebecca says
What perfect timing that devotional was! God is so faithful!! We ALL get caught up in the “small stuff” and lose sight of the big picture – it’s part of being human. The Lord knows our frame though!! “When I am weak… HE is strong!” God loves us in spite of our short-sightedness – and He DOES care about the “small stuff”! But then he brings these reminders our way – through the words of a friend, or reading a verse or a devotional – reminding us that there is something BIGGER going on than what our finite minds can even understand! I am so thankful that He gives us glimpses of His master plan. It gives such purpose to life and living. Thanks for sharing your heart, Stef!
Hugs, Rebecca
Walker says
Amen! you go girl!
thinking of you,
Keisha
Amanda says
I have never posted here, but after reading your post this morning I just felt compelled to! Thank you for posting your devotional & thank you for reminding me that everything is in his time!
Also, your family is a huge reason that my husband & I have chosen special needs for our second adoption. Your post on Jude’s blog “Why not special needs” pretty much changed our lives! Your family is such an inspiration to us & we thank you π
Amanda
Denise says
God has been speaking to me about this very thing as we wait on our TA. He also reminds me to be thankful in ALL things, even this wait!
Thank you for putting into words what God wants all of us to do, no matter what He has called us to~
Stefanie says
Hey Amanda!
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! And I am humbled that God used our story to help in your decision to pursue a waiting child! How wonderful that you will be going back to China again!! Please keep me posted π
Tish says
oooh, I’ve been going through that lately, too! I was just reading about Brother Lawrence last night and thought this statement was really good:
We ought to give ourselves up to God with regard both to things temporal and spiritual and seek our satisfaction only in the fulfilling of His will. Whether God led us by suffering or by consolation all would be equal to a soul truly resigned.
May we seek only to love God “with all our heart” and let Him take care of the rest.
Kayce says
Beautiful post!
AnnaB says
I cried girl! I read this to my husband. Your commitment and testimony of the Savior and His plan is beautiful. I was needing to hear “stop focusing on events and take in the big picture”. And it is all for our GOOD. That is the beauty of it.
Much love to you this Friday! (and thanks!)
Barbie says
How beautiful! I am glad you were reminded that God has called us for a journey, His journey through us. I know sometimes it is hard to find rest in that. I will pray that you will be reminded of that daily!
Colleen says
What a wonderful and heartfelt post! I can’t wait to come along on your magnificent journey!
Patricia/NYC says
PERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL POST!!!
I needed to read that today, at this very moment, as well. Thank you, Stefanie!!
Have you ever considered writing a book or guest speaking at events? You are really WONDERFUL at this!!
Your calling goes way past advocating for the little ones who wait! π
kris says
You rock! I can’t wait to watch God lead you by His hand, turning the pages, writing the story- what will the next chapter be filled with? Well, no loss of love for sure! And I sit here with anticipation, wondering what that next adventure will be, and how it will read π
Anita says
OH my Stef….you have NO idea how much I needed this post today from you as I’ve been holding on to the keyboard, computer, steering wheel…you name it….white-knuckled hoping not to miss what the Lord wants us to do next and trying desperately to understand all that’s taking place….knowing full well that He has always led us on this adventure before and will continue to do it because HE wants us to KNOW HIS WILL. So, thank you for your encouragement today that I can once again take a deep breath and watch Him work.
Family4Liv says
I am conviced that I see God at work in what you are doing here! We are all vessels in one way or another.I sence the excitement in your post and am glad things are going better.I am more and more intrigued by the power and conviction of the spirit for so many of us to go back and adopt right away! I know we certainly arent the first and hopefully not the last. This is a wonderful and postive connection between so many of us! I feel like we’ll all need a reunion of sorts at some point. That would be amazing…We still call you guys steph and chris plus eight…
Matt, Melissa, Tyler & Brooke says
I am so glad to have found this blog – as another mom of SN babies, I applaud your efforts in China. Following God’s course for our lives is scary sometimes, but it’s SO worthwhile when the wait is over. I will be praying for Shephard as I constantly pray for our SN baby who’s on her way home as well…Brooke. May God pour his blessings on these beautiful children!!! Keep up your hard work!!!
Truly Blessed says
Wow. I posted an almost identical post to this about three days ago.
I guess we all need the reminders every now and then to slow down and enjoy every moment. Our children wait for us, it’s true, but our Heavenly Father is completely in control of our adoptions, and is with our precious babies even when we can’t be.
Sometimes I need the daily reminder to “give thanks in ALL circumstances” (I Th. 5:18) — even during this wait. He will use this wait to prepare us (and our waiting children) or teach us something.
It’s hard to hear His “still, small voice” when our thoughts are screaming at us so loudly.
Thanks for the reminder!